{"id":9554,"date":"2020-08-03T01:03:00","date_gmt":"2020-08-03T01:03:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.mytutor.co.uk\/blog\/?p=9554"},"modified":"2023-03-14T14:42:29","modified_gmt":"2023-03-14T14:42:29","slug":"mytutor-unmind-managing-uncertainty","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mytutor.co.uk\/blog\/parents\/mytutor-unmind-managing-uncertainty\/","title":{"rendered":"Results day nerves? Here’s how to help your teen to manage uncertainty"},"content":{"rendered":"

The last couple of years have been incredibly disrupted for teens – school closures, different grading systems, remote learning – the lot. And now with results day approaching, teens have the regular anxiety of waiting to see what grades they’ve got, with the added twist of a different grading system. That’s a recipe for nerves if you ask us.<\/p>\n

The thing is, learning to navigate uncertainty is a skill that sets teens up for life – as well as results day. And while you can’t stop your child experiencing anxiety over situations that are out of control, as a parent you can help them a lot by teaching them how to manage their feelings at times like these. We spoke to the psychologists over at mental health platform Unmind<\/a> for their advice on how parents can support their teens ahead of results day. Check out what they had to say below.<\/p>\n

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1. Normalise uncertainty<\/strong><\/h3>\n

As humans, we\u2019re hardwired to struggle with uncertainty. When confronted with it \u2013 such as how things will unfold with exams \u2013 we fill in the blanks with our own narratives, which are often negative. So first acknowledge this and normalise it. Now think of ways that you the parent can offer certainty \u2013 this could come in the form of anything from a clear daily schedule to the reminder that everyone is in the same position.<\/p>\n

Even if they get results they’re not happy with, there will always be options. If they\u2019re worried about whether they’ll get the grades for the university or college of their choice, simply reassuring them that it\u2019s normal to feel anxious about this can help make the lead-up much calmer.<\/p>\n

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2. Talk about it<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Another technique is emotional reasoning. Amid feelings of anxiety we convince ourselves there must be something horribly wrong (or else why would we feel so knotted?) but actually this isn\u2019t always the case. Help them to be objective about the facts and the real \u2013 often quite low \u2013 levels of serious threat involved. Whatever grades they get, there’s always a plan B (and C, and D). Parents should also remind their kids that education is important, but that your love for them doesn\u2019t depend on high grades.<\/span><\/p>\n

3. Get them to focus on what they can<\/em> control<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Encourage them to direct their energy towards things that are within their control \u2013 not what\u2019s outside of it. For instance, it\u2019s not practical to ruminate over the impact of the climate crisis, however it is effective to go green, go to protests, or to raise awareness of the issue. Similarly, with regards to the pandemic, you can\u2019t control what happens but you can control how you respond to it \u2013 such as wearing a mask and washing your hands.<\/p>\n

If your child is anxious about going back to school, remind them that it\u2019s likely their entire school will be sharing similar feelings of unease to a lesser or greater extent. To fill in some of the blanks, encourage them to focus on what\u2019s known and certain \u2013 the health and safety measures in place at school, how they will get to school each day, and what their days will look like.<\/p>\n

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4. Help them avoid comparing themselves to others<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Everyone has things that they’re good at and things they struggle with, and they’re not all measurable by school grades! As parents, it can help to remind your teen not to compare their grades to those of their friends, and to be proud of what they’ve achieved irrespective of results- they’ve navigated their education through a pandemic! However they’re feeling, it helps to encourage children to talk about their concerns and work through specific anxieties like these together.<\/p>\n

Thanks Unmind<\/a>!<\/p>\n

If your teen would like any help with their school work over the holidays, out online tutors<\/a> are on-hand to offer advice, guidance and mentoring through this tricky time. Our tutors are all subject experts from UK unis, and they went through the same process as your child in the past few years (so they can empathise with their education being disrupted this year too!). Have a browse for a tutor<\/a> or book a call<\/a> with one of our tutor experts, and we’ll help you find what you need.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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